Learning to become more comfortable around people is all about becoming “desensitized” to the situation.
And as with everything that I teach, it is best to be done in “small, manageable steps”.
The best way to begin is to identify a situation that you are able to enter with lower levels of anxiety and then build from there. Regardless of the specific trigger, everyone has a starting point, and finding this starting point is very helpful in learning to work towards recovery.
What will also be of great benefit to you is the use of “tools” – you can find information on the different types of tools and how to use them throughout my website. But keep in mind that the tools are designed to take our attention off of our “anxious driven” thoughts, and allow us to create a new pattern of thinking (behavior).
You see, all anxiety is based on a futuristic “what if” thought. The tools allow us to learn to look away from the “what if” thought and not respond to it in a way that causes us suffering. This takes time and practice, but it is through this process that we can create a new behavior and therefore create recovery.
Once you find your starting point as I mentioned above, and you have learned the tools, now it is time for “purposeful practice”.
Purposeful practice is learning to engage your anxiety and create a new behavior once you are exposed to the situation that causes you higher levels of anxiety. With the tools in hand, enter into your specific situation – in small,. manageable steps – and learn to look away from your fear.
Ultimately using the tools and learning to manage our thoughts – we feel empowered, and through this empowerment we build confidence. These two are the foundation of recovery – empowerment & confidence!
Let me know if you have any further questions – or would like more specific information regarding your own personal experiences. I am happy to share all I know.